Talk to Tippy for outrageously honest advice. Call it the second opinion we all wish we had. Unabashed and candid and insightful – trust Tippy for guidance with dating, relationship or sexual conundrums. Yes, you can Talk to Tippy!
Dear Cats and Kittens,
It’s almost that lazy hazy crazy holiday time of year again and it brings me to thoughts of sex. How bizarre, I know.
I just drizzled warm dark sweet chocolate all over my companions willing package and had my way with it, and him. How do you meld food and sex? Or do you? It can be a most successful diversion from the same old cat and mouse. Do tell. And then, we’ll discuss.
I’m a in my fifties. I’m a successful divorcee in the music business. I just started seeing a fellow who has been a friend of mine for some time and strange things are starting to develop in this new relationship. He claims to be very sexual and regularly speaks about his previous conquests and his successes in bed which I find uncomfortable for sure, but what’s unusual is that he can’t seem to maintain an erection and I feel like I am being blamed. I am so conflicted about this, feel like I’m losing perspective and could use another opinion. Yours, particularly.
No Music Left
Dear Musical Note,
There’s a lot going on there. First of all, let’s assume that you and he were good friends and because you kept finding yourselves in the same circles, you jumped into the next most most likely phasee – right smack into a romantic relationship. This is not uncommon. Not for anyone of any age group. We commonly mistrust the comfort and safety of a friendship and the foundation for romance. But alas – it is usually not the case. This is another topic that should have been covered in middle school. Right beside the non elective courses on personal finance management and human kindness 101.
But whatever, I digress.
And let’s assume that you are a normal-ish, well adjusted, attractive, interesting and informed gal.
Drop him. But only as a lover. Explain very very clearly that you were such good friends and you cherished that relationship but having him as a lover has you missing the friend you once had. He will counter saying you “can have it all”, but clearly you can’t. Especially if he can’t keep his tool engaged during your private, loving time, and instead feels justified taking that “special time” recounting tales of past conquests. Added to that, no man, no person, no one; should use such blatant passive aggressive tactics which you and I both know will begin to wear down your self confidence and prowess. Hopefully you will make the decision to leave before you are a trembling mass of human protoplasm on the cold sidewalk of life.
Rise above the phlebian masses, state your case, stick to your guns and move forward, head held high. This is not about you and him. This is about you. Do it.