Posts Tagged ‘slump’

More From The Invisible Woman

Posted on: August 23rd, 2016 by Madison Lake No Comments

Let’s talk about sexy.

I’m beginning to understand how and why women in middle age start to let themselves go. We’re invisible, so why bother? We’re also comfortable in our skin. 

I have a dog. I take my dog for walks every morning and late afternoon. Long walks. I usually throw on a pair of sweats and a tee or my workout clothes — sexy in their own way, right? Sometimes I stay in the same clothes for the day because a) I’m working at home and want to be comfortable, b) I’ll be dressed and ready for the afternoon walk, c) nobody sees me anyway (ha!). I0000cv8mIkYkVAQ

I know it sounds like I’m feeling sorry for myself but I’m trying to prove a point. We should all dress for comfort but we should also dress like we care — about ourselves.

Some women let themselves go because they’ve been in a relationship for many years. It’s easy. They’re relaxed. They can be who they want, as they should be. Middle age and upward includes a changing body; less tone and more volume. It sucks. Body image is a constant struggle. However, that shouldn’t keep you from putting an effort into keeping the love and sex in your relationship alive, and that includes not looking like a schlump. When you look like a schlump, you often feel like a schlump. 

Men are guilty of this too. Being comfy is great. It’s the only way to feel. Not caring how you look is the difference.

When you’re single, the ante is upped. You have no one to be sexy for, no one to think you look great and no one to keep the love alive with. But guess what? You do. If you love yourself, which you need to do without question, you do have someone to look and feel good for. YOU. And this goes for all women and men, single or in a relationship. 

Whether walking a dog, going to the grocery store, visiting a longtime friend, whatever, don’t neglect your person. Care about your feelings and appearance. There is no correct style, no right or wrong way to dress. You can have piercings or tattoos. You can have long hair or short, be thin or thick, just keep your game on, even if you feel invisible.

imagesLooks are certainly not everything. Not even close.

Smart Is Sexy!

Stay tuned for next week’s blog on Titillating Tuesday.


Posted on: May 17th, 2016 by Madison Lake 1 Comment

New chapterI’ve been in a writing slump.

There, I said it.

It’s the first (but probably not the last) slump I’ve been in – ever.

My normal day consists of waking around 7:30, feeding the mutt, climbing back into bed (sometimes with a coffee), checking my mail and social media, then heading out for a good walk with Pippa. Once I’m home again, I hunker down to my computer and write.

If I’m lucky, I’ll work on a book or project I have on the go. Sometimes I am in the throes of editing, and other times I have submissions to prepare, a more arduous task. Clearly my favourite is when I am ensconced in a novel or book of poetry because I am 100% there and I can write all day without realizing it, until Pippa rouses me because she has to walk again – and so should I.

I think this slump started with the last rejection letter from an editor who I truly thought was interested in my second book of poetry, who had been encouraging me as I rewrote and edited and resubmitted a year later.

Rejections are part of a writer’s life. You better get used to them early on because they will always be there, testing your strength and commitment. Testing the thickness of your skin. But sometimes they simply wear you down.

My latest novel sits on my desktop, a distant reminder of a cast of characters waiting to be brought out again, relationships seeking development, love hanging in the ether. I flip through pages and promise them life.

I have the (rejected) poems printed off, lying in wait to be reviewed, revamped, rearranged – or not. Maybe I’ll just send the manuscript as is to a new publisher. But not yet.

It is my time to regroup, to breathe, to explore more of the world around me. As I do, my head swells with new ideas for books or stories or poems. They are everywhere, as always. Strength slowly begins to return to my deflated being and I can feel the pull, the need, to write again. But not the urgency.

First it is time to replenish.